glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
