ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize