Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
