I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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