Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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