either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
