i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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