It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
