You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Naked Twister starts at high noon
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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