I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize