i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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