Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize