ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
