Pants 0. Shit 1.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
he puts the penis in happiness.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
the liver wants what the liver wants
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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