using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Randomize