This girl is more easily done than said...
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize