She's JV to your varsity
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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