So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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