i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
