but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
