matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
