Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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