Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
