dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
