Yo dont text me then not text me
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Randomize
