I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
