sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
