I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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