I wish my penis had an off switch
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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