you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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