I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
