you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
