Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
my being single is dangerous.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
