Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
