I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
