if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
My liver just broke up with me...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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