i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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