PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
