"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
