now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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