Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
organizing the empties. That sober.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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