OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Boobs speak an international language.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Randomize
