Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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