it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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