...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Did we literally take a cab across the street
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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