Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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