I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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