I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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