ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
