question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
