There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
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