idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
